LETS TALK ABOUT IT
ITS AS SIMPLE AS YES OR NO
This is a biggie, so listen up, boys. Just like in a bar, or on the street, consent is a vital thing to bear in mind when cruising anywhere – not just in a darkroom.
Some people seem to think that just because you’re there, you’re open game and they can just grab you when you’re not looking. This is NOT the case. That’s like a straight man slapping a woman’s arse because she wore a short skirt. No, she wasn’t asking for it. She was just dressing in a way that made her feel good about herself. Behaviour like this is actually on the rape culture pyramid and could land you with a punch i n the face.
The key here is establishing some sort of a connection, even a tiny one, before you initiate any form of physical contact with someone. Maybe you both looked at each other for a while and he smiled at you. Maybe you said hello and he replied in an interested way. These are green lights. But don’t think that means you can go straight for it!
Warm him up a little first. Stroke his pecs or his arm – see how he responds. You’ll know very quickly if he’s into it or not. If he is – go for it and enjoy! If at any time above he’s not shown interest in you, he’s not playing hard to get… he’s just not interested. Stop trying. No means no – even if he didn’t say the word! Also look out for each other if you see something that doesn’t look right ask if everything is OK